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TITLE: Celebrity Gossip - The Superficial - Because You're Ugly ,

KEYWORDS: comments of the week , the crap we missed , britney spears , cannes , nicole kidman , zac efron , kanye west , drunk , dui , jenna jameson ,

DESCRIPTION: Celebrity Gossip and Celebrity Photos on The Superficial. Outrgeous commentary on celebrities , what they wear , and what they say and do. ,

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Celebrity Gossip - The Superficial - Because You're Ugly . Trending: . » . » . » . » . » . » . » . » . » . » . May 26th 2012 // . Welcome to another infected exciting installment of . brought to you by the letters S T and D and featuring an almost gynecological glimpse into . ‘s death-hole that you get to stare at until we get back on Tuesday. Think of it as our way of saying thanks for coming up with funny shit to populate this post each week. We always give the best gifts I know. Now would be a good time to start buying hand sanitizer in bulk - The Superficial . Photo: . Share: . Posted Under: . May 25th 2012 // . Welcome to Friday’s . coming at you early because our numbers indicate there are five of you reading this right now and we also calculated that booze is delicious. Anyway today we’ve got an important status report regarding . ‘s face since yesterday: Still Awful. Also . wants you to know that when you mess with him you get the horns. In your butt. Meanwhile a heroic Spanish talk-show host attempts to help . fight off the gay thoughts and . defiles a children’s amusement. Mommy why’s the horsey melting - Photo Boy . Photo: . Share: . Posted Under: . May 25th 2012 // . Britney's X-Factor Rider Sounds About Right . With a dressing room stocked full of . tater salad and all the Doritos a girl can eat hanging in the balance you’d just assume . would take her first day as an X Factor judge very seriously. You keep saying she’s also getting paid 15 million like that means something. I don’t get it. Instead she walked off in the middle of an audition which is exactly why Simon banned candy wrappers from being on set. “She can bloody smell them you twits” . reports: Britney Spears walked off the set of “X Factor” moments ago … and according to several people in the audience she was upset after a contestant butchered her song “Hold It Against Me.”Britney did not come back immediately … and four contestants auditioned in front of the remaining judges … and an empty seat. Ha I like how they pretended she can recognize her own songs. But seriously how the hell did they expect this to go down You’re dealing with a woman has a set routine every afternoon of chocolate milk one episode of SpongeBob Two if she doesn’t let her kids play with the garbage disposal again. then naptime. You interrupt that schedule and you might as well forget getting her to sit still during dinner. That’s your funeral bub. Photos: . Share: . Posted Under: . May 25th 2012 // . Back that way Thanks. Photos: Getty . Share: . Posted Under: . May 25th 2012 // . Kim Kardashian Is A Stalker Now . You may have noticed . and . all over the place at Cannes which of course turned out to be a giant publicity grab See how . for his short film “experience” Cruel Summer that debuted last night. Though not so much as part of the festival as part of Kanye renting out a giant tent in the middle of a casino parking lot. Long story short the short’s about a car thief who falls in love with a Arabian princess You can beat your head into your desk now. but her parents won’t let them be together until he cures her blindness because car thieves do that. Anyway the whole thing was apparently displayed on seven screens completely surrounding the audience – “three opposite the bleachers two on either side one on the ceiling and one on the floor” – because Kanye West can’t pay attention to movies. No really. Via . : “The seven screens idea is related to a postSteve Jobs post-Windows era of where we’re always on a BlackBerry or a phone at a ballgame at the movies and you’re looking at seven windows when you’re online. And I’ve found myself even falling asleep at the theater unless I’m talking to somebody or I’m on the phone and it’s because of the amount of information that we have at once. “So really the whole genesis of this presentation comes from the fact that I’m a fucking asshole to watch movies with. Just terrible. I played Angry Birds during Inception and can you believe people tried to shush me Kanye West Well look who’s trapped inside my movie now bitches. HAHAHA SHUSH SHUSH YOUR MOUTHS AHAHAHAHAHA- Shit it’s James Bond. To the zeppelin yo” fires up jetpack . Photos: . Getty . Share: . Posted Under: . May 25th 2012 // . Jenna Jameson Isn't A Fan . Porn star . drunkenly ramming into a pole is somehow news this morning so eh what the hell I’ll take a trip down your rabbit hole . : Law enforcement sources tell TMZ the porn queen was involved in a single car accident at around 1:30 AM after her car struck a pole.According to our sources Jameson showed signs of possibly being under the influence of alcohol and was given a field sobriety test . We’re told she was subsequently arrested for misdemeanor suspicion of DUI. Transcript of 911 Call: “Some chick just crashed into a pole. I think she’s really hurt too. It looks a grenade went off between her legs-”Inaudible sound“Nevermind she says it always look like that.”Inaudible sound“Ma’am I’m a woman please stop offering to suck my dick if I help you escape. The police are already here.”Screaming in background“Officer officer It’s okay it’s okay. That’s just how it looks. — Listen I’m gonna hang up. This guy’s freaking out.” END CALL. . Photos: Getty Share: . Posted Under: . 1 . Bikini Madness . Most Important People . May '12 1 . About to hit #1 in the US. 2 . Produced by Darkchild. Catchy urban/pop single. 3 . Official third single off Kelly's album 'Stronger'. 4 . Dr Luke-produced mid-tempo pop single. 5 . 1st single from LP's "Living Things". 6 . JB shows off his 'swag swag' on his new single. 7 . The Bajan's singer's new club anthem. 8 . His new single pop single. Produced by Max Martin. 9 . The diva's last recorded song. From 'Sparkle' film. 10 . J.Lo's brand new single featuring Flo Rida. . Sign In: . Sign Up: . LostPassword: A message will be sent to the email address of the account.

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